Grocery shopping

Shit, I gotta do some groceries. Fuck. Running out of food. All I got is jar of mayo in the fridge and I think that’s gone bad months ago. I never cook or eat at home so I almost never do any groceries. I drink a lot of coffee, though, so I gotta restock on that.

There’s the coffee isle… Aw, fuck! I forgot my coffee machine broke. Fucking smashed the fucker. Instant coffee is fucking garbage but I’ll buy it anyway. I’ll get three large jars.

Oh, I need to buy some candy too. The little shit-stain won’t keep quiet unless you give him candy. Except now, I think the candy trick isn’t working very well. He’s not falling for it so I guess I’d better stick to my fists. I ought to gag him or, better yet, staple his lips together. Hehehe, I like that idea.

He’s a good stress relief, that kid. Loud, though. He squirms a lot, too. He squirmed a lot on his first time. I had to hold him down by his neck. It makes me smile remembering him face down on the bed, crying his fucking eyes down. I love to see him cry. He’s pretty when he cries. I love to see his nose red, brows furrowed, face twisted into a pained grimace…

… So I hurt him on purposed. I burn him with my cigarettes. I tell him he will never amount to anything. I tell him if he looked different, spoke different, was something special then I would’ve loved him. I call him a ‘cockroach’. I didn’t lie. That is what he is. I call him a ‘cockroach’ and remind him no one would ever love a roach and roaches will never make anything of themselves. They belong in dumpsters. And he bought it. And until now my words weigh heavy on his soul and his optimistic nature is obviously an act. He goes home to cry, alone and miserable. He always comes back to me because I’m the only one he has in his life. Well, there’s also that one other fucker. Maybe, I’ll convince the little shit not to hang out with him.

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Wise Words from Ike

Here’s another. I like doing these. They help me explore the minds of the characters speaking.
Wise words from Ike
How am I so laid-back? I dunno. I just am. I mean, what is there in this life for me to be so stressed about? What in this wide world is there for me to worry over? Nothing. There isn’t anything. And there isn’t anything for you to worry about either. Let me tell you: I woke up one day, no memories, no nothing, just the clothes on my back. I didn’t know my own name, who I am, where I’m from. Nothing. I had to have people name me. They called me Ike because they didn’t even know what my name was, and what was I supposed to tell them? I didn’t know either. So my name is Ike since then. My family? Friends? Not a single face comes to mind. No one except the people I first saw when I came to. Now, you might think, ‘that’s a shitty situation!’, and… well… what good would crying over it do? So I lost my memories. Nothing I can do about it. But am I going to stay sad about it for the rest of my life? Or should I see this as a chance to turn over a new leaf? My memories are gone and I can’t get them back, might as well make new ones, right? One thing I’ve noticed about you, Sly, is that you react negatively to bad things that happen to you. I mean overly negative. You can’t just sit there miserable the whole day long! How are you ever going to solve anything when you’re too busy getting pissed off to do anything!

You need to chill. You need to take a deep breath and think about what happened to you. And not in a negative way, mind you, but in a, um, neutral way? Like, say you- aw, crap- you, uh… you were baking cookies, okay? Work with me. You’re baking cookies and you measured the ingredients precisely down to the last milligram. You make the dough, put it on the pan, pop it in the oven. Perfectly. You wait. You wait a little too long. Cookies burn. It sucks; you worked too hard. Knowing you, you’d probably thinking that your whole day is shit now. The next problem you’ll face is just another addition to your current stress. ‘Today is garbage’, you’ll say. You’ll probably quit baking cookies. Everything went to waste. But what good did getting angry do? The next thing that happens to you will piss you off even more.

Here’s what I would do. First, thing is I would measure the ingredients. I would also keep in mind that what happens after that is not what I imagine it to be. Less stress if things get out of hand. Next, make the dough, put it in the oven. Well, shit. Cookies burned. What a waste. Good reason to bake more cookies. Worrying about the future doesn’t really help. Things might not go according to plan then you end up with regret and regret is a problem in itself. Shit that happened in the past, leave them in the past. Worrying about the past never helps. Just makes you wish you could change it and guess what: you can’t! Leave your regrets. The inevitable happens. And stop having such high hopes for the future. The inevitable happens. But then what’s the point of living? Well, if I weren’t here, I wouldn’t have had the pleasure of having this little butterfly sit on my knee. And if you weren’t here, you wouldn’t have had the pleasure of listening to me. Or am I boring you to tears? No? Ok, good. You had me worried. See, it’s not about what happened or what will happen but what is happening and what you are doing. Like, you bake cookies because it is fun and the cookies in the end are a bonus. You don’t always get a reward for what you do. Well, at least not for reapers. Our job doesn’t come with a reward but we have to do it. But I made some good memories! And if I didn’t have that job I never would’ve ran from it since there’d be nothing to run from.

So, to recap all of this, the past and the future don’t matter much. It’s what you do now and how you feel about it. And that is how you become a chill dude. Like me.

Wise Words from Jack

Okay, I don’t know if I have posted this up before or not but just in case I didn’t, well, here ya go.

This isn’t a story or anything, just something I though a character would say to another. Some advice, you know?

>Words of Wisdom from Jack

Focus. Being focused is important. Focus on what you want, on what is important to you. You have a role to play in this life. What is your role in life? Well, that’s for you to decide and only you. You need to figure that out, your role. Then you need to focus on that. Like me, I’m a reaper and my job is to reap souls. I focus on doing that and I need to do it right. It has to perfect. That job has to be done perfectly. You? You’re a human so you can’t be perfect, but that doesn’t mean you get to half-ass it. You need to do your best, saves you from a lot of hassle later on. If you do it right from the start- by ‘right’ I mean the right way- then you won’t have to worry about your mistakes and how to fix them later. You won’t need to start over as much. I think this rule applies to just about anything. Also, if you’re going to do something, better do it on time. Diligence is important. Punctuality is important. Aiming for perfection is what you need to do. I know I sound annoying at this point, but… I dunno. That’s just how I do things. I believe you should get things done and you need to do it right. If you can’t do it well then just do it. Even if you know you will fail, do it just to say you have tried to. If you run away from a task or a problem because you know you will fail, then you have already failed before you even started. So just do what you gotta do, try hard to get it done and if you could, try hard to make it perfect. Or as best you can.

That means no slacking off! You got that, Gavin?!

Tears and Shivers

Well, what do you know. I have stomach flu… Today is very miserable day for me but hey, at least it’s inspiration for a story to match my sick in bed Gavin picture. Woo hoo, I suppose.

Gavin lay in bed groaning and grumbling when Jack, now having enough spare time before his next reaping session, decided to drop in only to find the tattooed freak curled up into a ball underneath the covers.

“What is up with you?”, asked Jack, raising an eyebrow.

“Have you come to take my soul?”, asked Gavin.

“Of course not, don’t be silly. Now get out of bed.”

“I’m dying”, Gavin moaned.

“No, you’re not!”

“Okay, but seriously, I am sick.”

“Sick?”, said Jack, “I don’t know how to deal with sickness. Oh, I know! I’ll call Sly and ask him what to do.”

“He’s useless.”

In the meantime, Sly was in his office at work when his cell phone rang. He answered it only to find it was Jack on the other end of the line.

“I need your help”, said Jack’s voice. Sly was silent for a moment. A reaper needing his help? For what? What is there for him to do that a powerful being like Jack can’t? Sly swallowed. Just when he was about to ask how he can help…

“Gavin’s sick.”

“Sick? As in flu?”

“Yeah.”

Well, that made sense. Reapers don’t understand sickness very well, at least not all of them do.

“Are you sure he’s not faking it?”, asked Sly. The thought hadn’t occured to Jack. Did humans actually fake illness? He turned to Gavin.

“You’re not faking it, are you?”

“What?! No! Why would I be faking it? I told you Sly’s useless and you’re not helping either! You’re just an idiot!”

“He says he’s not faking it. How can I tell if he’s faking or not?”

Sly sighed. He had always known Jack to be really knowledgeable but today he seemed absolutely clueless. He had never thought he see the day when Jack would become a dimwit. He was half happy that the intellectual Jack was dumbed down and half frustrated because now he had to fix Jack’s problem during his working hours.

“I dunno. Just take his temperature or something.”

“Okaaaay…”, came Jack’s voice, sounding like he was wondering how to do that.

“Can you find a thermometer?”, asked Sly, he lack of patience accidentally shown in his voice.

“Yup, here it is.”

“Great, now shove it up his ass. NO! Don’t do that! Uh, put it in his mouth or something.”

Gavin yanked the thermometer from Jack’s hand. He didn’t trust Jack nor Sly at the moment. He placed the thermometer under his tongue and wondered whether if there was any point at all in doing so. He had already assumed what his temperature would be. He pulled the thermometer out and grimaced when it showed the exact digits as he had guessed.

“38 degrees”, Jack repeated over the phone as Gavin began to complain.

“I hate being sick! I’m tired and dizzy and everything hurts too much! My body’s system is all fucked up, I’m vomitting out of my asshole!”

“Gavin!”, Jack scolded and Sly heard him.

“What? What happened?”, he asked, worried.

“Oh, he’s just being an idiot.”

“What did he do?”

“He said he’s ‘vomitting out of his asshole’.”

Sly couldn’t help but burst out laughing in the office. He immediately covered his mouth and silenced himself hoping no one passing by had heard him.

“Oh no! Well, make sure he drinks plenty of water and gets enough rest. Has he tried eating anything?”

Jack relayed the question to Gavin who slowly lifted his head of his pillow once he came to a realization.

“I haven’t eaten anything since yesterday afternoon.”

When Sly heard what Gavin had said through Jack, he immediately asked to personally speak to him. Jack handed to phone over to Gavin. Even though he hadn’t heard what the two were discussing, he was sure Sly was telling Gavin to watch his health. He could hear Gavin responding with tired ‘yeah’s, ‘okay’s and ‘alright’s. He then gave the phone back to Jack and Sly began to instruct him.

“Can you please fix him something to eat? Can you make him some soup?”

“Yeah, I can do that.”

“Alright. Keep an eye on him and, if things get worse take him to a doctor.”

“Got it.”

Jack borrowed Gavin’s kitchen to make some soup. For an entity that never ate, Jack cooked surprisingly well. He picked up the skill from an old friend, a reaper who would rather mingle with the humans than reap their souls. He hummed cheerily as he cooked. There was something pleasant about cooking and he enjoyed this useless (well, at least to himself) skill despite rarely needing it. Gavin was the only one who ate his food but then again, Gavin was the only closest human friend he had. Once he brought back a bowl of soup to Gavin’s room, he found the boy curled up, clutching his stomach, weeping, a complete mess.

“It hurts”, he sobbed, “My stomach hurts! I feel like I’m being stabbed with knives! God!”
(That’s all for now. G’night everybody.)

Sick

I don’t really have a story in mind. I just feel like talking about this picture that I drew. I’m so proud of it especially since I am not that good at coloring. 

A friend of mine was feeling a bit under the weather and asked me to draw a picture of my character Gavin. For a while I have wanted to write a story based on this image but nothing good comes to mind.

I love how his face turned out. His eyebrows furrowed in frustration as he is reading the thermometer, his face flushed, and this time he’s blond like he should be and not a ginger!

I like talking about the characters I come up with and that is why I write stories. But sometimes I have nothing good to write. There’s no plot to there stories.

This is out of the blue but my most recent character is a werewolf.

That’s all for today!

Those Around Me

  

 ​I was still exhausted from my plane ride. Waiting for a cab to pick me up tuckered me out even more. I hate waiting. After placing my luggage into the trunk of the cab, I hopped in and gave the driver a piece of paper with the address on it. He gave me a nod and drove off. I remember during the ride to Rai and Ren’s home I kept wanting to burst through their door, drop all my stuff, collapse onto the floor and fall asleep right then and there. However, once I got to their house they told me they had a dinner party to attend to and were allowed to bring a friend along. They asked if I didn’t mind coming with them. I said I didn’t despite being completely exhausted from my travel and a short while later had to get ready for dinner. There at the party, I saw my old friends that I used to hang out with back when I used to live here. Hanging out with them made me feel a strong sense of nostalgia. Just like Rai and Ren when they first saw me, they all commented on my tattoos, and I told them the story behind my black flames (okay, so there really wasn’t any story. I just though it was cool).

   Once we got back from the party, I immediately changed and went to sleep. I slept well however, I did have an odd dream. In that dream I came across a golden glowing cat. I woke up feeling weird for some reason and as for that dream, I didn’t really know what it meant and I still don’t. I didn’t think much of the dream. The next morning, I was getting ready to have breakfast with Rai and Ren’s family. Before traveling for the holidays, Ren asked me online if I would like to spend time with him and his family. I eagerly said “yes”, and here I am, getting ready. I was excited. It’s been a while since I have been there and I kinda miss the place. As expected, it was quiet and humble there just like it was when I first visited many years ago.

   Ren’s family were very welcoming and made me feel like I was a part of the family. I was happy to feel the warmth and closeness they radiated. The majority there were all so much older than Ren, Rai and I. It was mostly uncles and aunts and the grandparents. We all had a hearty breakfast. I was sat down at a table between two empty chairs: one was Rai’s seat, the other was Ren’s and both were now in the kitchen helping out and bringing the food over to the table. It was times like this I felt a bit jealous about their eagerness to help others out, especially Ren. In fact, I felt a strong admiration and a little bit of envy towards Ren. He was so kind to everyone, he even helped me out several times in exchange for nothing. When I first moved here when I was younger, Ren was then only friend I had. He came up to me to talk when I was all alone.

 Ren came into the dining room with a large bowl full of diced seasoned potatoes. I began to drool as the smell of the food reached my nose and I dearly hoped no one heard my stomach grumble. Rai carried various bean dishes (baked beans, chickpeas, broad beans) neatly piled in tiny bowls and placed them on the table as well as egg dishes. Baskets of bread and sandwiches were also brought in. It seemed like there was way too much to eat but one of ladies told me I didn’t have to eat everything, just the things I like. Ren ushered me to go ahead and eat as he sat down to my right. I tried to control to urge to savagely grab all the food and wolf them down.

   I was constantly offered different sandwiches. Even when I was full, they still offered. They were being nice and I, being a little bit shy, had trouble telling them I didn’t want anymore. They were being so polite, and I was starting to guess that maybe this is how Ren turned out to be the way he was. I wonder, if I lived with his family my whole life, would I be the same way? Always friendly, always helpful, always chipper, I wonder how he stays so optimistic…

Jack and Gavin

   ​“It’s too dangerous here. Gavin, you’re coming with me.”

   Jack’s face twisted into a sly grin then quickly wrapped his arm around the young man’s waist and before Gavin could say anything, Jack lifted him off his feet and darted. With the help of his Reaper’s Cloak, Jack was able to move as fast as the speed of  light as well as run up walls and buildings and through the cracks in the walls or underneath the door. Gavin, only if grabbed by a reaper, could do the same. Everything around Gavin literally seemed like nothing more than a blur. They were moving so fast, his mind wasn’t able to process what was happening. Jack, however, had full control of how he was moving.

   Jack stopped atop a tall building and began to survey his surroundings, while Gavin remained suspended in mid-air with nothing but Jack’s arm to support him. Looking down at the tiny flickering lights, which were most likely the cars’ headlights moving along the streets, and all the people walking down below barely visible from where he was, Gavin realized just how high up he was and suddenly a wave of nausea washed over him. He was unable to scream or even speak. All he could do was stare down below as he dangled from Jack arm. Jack, on the other hand, seemed unaware of how Gavin felt and showed no signs of distress whatsoever. Since this is his typical method of moving from on place to another and has always been for centuries, it is no suprise that to him that he would end up alost anywhere at all. He squinted at a far off place then said out loud, “I think we would be safer somewhere over there.”
   

   And with that, he simply lept off the building. At this point, Gavin had no idea whether he was flying, falling, zooming past the cars on hard ground or if he froze in time. He felt nothing except worry and that worry came from not feeling anything. Just before fear made its way into his heart, he found himself sitting on soft grass in a large empty field. There was no one around and everything was silent except for the chirping of crickets that can be heard clearly. The whole area was dark making Jack’s hair and eyes seem like they were glowing brighter than usual. Feeling the ground underneath his feet, Gavin began to feel relieved despite still trembling.

   “Are you ok?”

   Gavin still couldn’t manage to find his voice so he just nodded.
   “Good. That was fun, wasn’t it?”
Gavin stared at Jack as though he were crazy. Seeing Gavin’s bewildered expression, Jack patted him on the shoulder and said, “Well, you’re fine now. And it’s safe and quiet here. Why don’t we rest here a while?”

Stupid Boy

Excitable, energetic and at times bratty. There it is, his usual grin. There it is, his enthusiasm. See him run towards danger, fearless yet stupid. At least he’s not as bad as the other two. His closest friend is Death and yet this boy hasn’t died yet. How can he make friends with something that is not a part of his world? And yet, there he goes, grinning, Death sauntering by his side… wait. Shouldn’t that reaper be hard working and a perfectionist? Why is he hanging with a human boy? What is going on?
In a world you craft on your own, you can have anything.

Everything is the same

“Everything is the same. Nothing ever changes. Day in and day out. All the same. Why can’t we have any big events? Things to look foreward to.”

“I’m sure that’s not true. There’s plenty to look foreward to as well as big events. You just don’t take part.”

“There aren’t any events! Everything is boring as fuck! This town is so fucking dull.”

“I think it’s pretty neat.”

“Yeah, well, you’re pretty boring too. Just like everything out there.”

“You think everything is boring? Then do something about it! Entertain yourself.”

“How? There’s literally nothing to do.”

“You think your life is boring, huh? You think that every day is the same? How about you do my job from sunrise to sunset and for as long as I have and then tell me whether or not your life is boring and repeated, you ungrateful little shit. You complain about being unfulfilled and yet you barely get off your fucking ass to do anything about it! How about you shut the fuck up and do something for a change instead of bitching and whining. I have work to go”

I look up at him and his eyes shown disappointment

We had made a deal and I couldn’t keep my end

Of the bargain and now there was a kind of sadness,

A result of constantly finding rules to bend.